Waiting is so hard!

It's been a long week and I'm struggling with the disappointment that I didn't get "The Call". K keeps reminding me of all the reasons that the phone is silent, but I still feel "neglected and abandoned". I see so many positives in the job I want. I know God always has a better plan then what I could ever come up with, but I just think how much this job seems like it's "The One". I mean, I got the interview less than 12 hrs after submitting my resume. I am struggling with the knowledge that I don't think on my feet very well. I really don't feel I interview very well. What if she didn't clearly see that "spill overtime" is so much different than "run of the mill overtime". I don't want to pull and "all nighter" or work 60 hrs a week with no end in sight ever again. What if another answer wasn't clearly what she was looking for? *sigh* I keep trying to remember the questions and my answers. My friend M keeps telling me not to take it personal if she doesn't hire me, but it's so hard not to. That's just me. I guess I find myself in yet another situation where I have to "hang onto hope". Hope is so slippery. It's so hard to hang on to. Pray that "patience" isn't the lesson I must learn before finding a better job or having a baby, b/c I'll never attain either if that's the case. My boss is getting more and more unreasonable about the stupidest stuff. I really wish someone who has the management style I thrive under would either hire me or replace my current boss. The benefits are pretty good where I'm at. Especially the leave accrual (5 weeks a year for 2 years, 6 weeks 3-5 yrs, etc). The benefits are pretty good at PHS. Not sure about the leave accrual, but they do have tuition assistance. It's hard, this waiting. It seems my whole life I've been waiting and waiting and waiting. When will it end? Or rather, when will life get to where I don't notice the waiting?